The First Pregnancy

A lovely young friend of mine is pregnant with her first child. I rejoice in her happiness and she and her husband are eagerly waiting for the arrival while experiencing all that pregnancy has to offer. Heartburn, nausea, drowsiness during the day, difficulty sleeping through the night, and the ever-present full bladder! She is dealing with all of it with humor and wit and it is a joy talking with her.

When you talk with a woman experiencing her first pregnancy, it can be tempting to share all of the wisdom you have accumulated over your years of motherhood, but I try to keep it to a bare minimum. Remember how overwhelmed you may have felt when people told you their birth stories, gave you advice that you couldn’t even picture incorporating into your personal plans, or gave you a book’s worth of tips in one conversation. Forgive yourself if you have done that, but go forward and try not to ever do it again!

Instead, after thinking hard about things I really would have loved to hear when I was pregnant the first time, I made a list of things I could share. Never all of them at the same time, of course, but these seemed constructive to me. Continue reading

Pets, Parallels and Principles

Indy, Cloud, & Murray

“There are many parallels between training dogs and raising children.”

I was reminded of this wisdom as my grown daughters have married and brought “fur babies” into their homes, both as puppies and as a slightly older rescue. The clarity and consistency of instruction that is required to make a dog feel safe, secure, loved, and well-behaved are often the same as required by young children, and for the very same reason.

When we feel safe and loved and our basic needs are met, we are able to perform to our highest potential. Continue reading

Making Moments Memorable

The Power of MomentsManagement Parallel: How do you make employees and co-workers feel truly valued? Is a small bonus or a certificate really going to do the trick?

My husband, a customer service expert, is adept at finding great sources of information that make very complex subjects more understandable. He recently shared “The Power of Moments” by Chip & Dan Heath, and I was struck not only by its applicability to a current nonprofit project I am working on but how it validated “Rites of Passage for Your Children.”

Continue reading

Considering the Second Child

A friend asked me the other day if the memory of the pain of childbirth goes away. I was kind of surprised and asked why he wanted to know.

“We are thinking about a second child, and I wondered if women just forgot the pain or blocked it somehow to make it possible to go through that again,” he said. Continue reading

2016 Election – What Do I Tell the Kids?

Election 2016Many people will be blogging about this, and they will come from many different perspectives. Everything from bullying, to racism, to sexism will be pulled out, examined ad infinitum, and tossed back into the whirling chum that is our media coverage. People will display an array of emotions, and some people who would have hesitated to air negative and acrimonious feelings and opinions in the past may feel this is the time to let it all out.

Just for a moment, take a breath with me and think about the children.  Continue reading