On my wedding day, I asked my father-in-law, a highly respected salesman, motivational speaker and the most charming person I have ever known, how he and his wife had stayed so happily and romantically married for so many years. He considered and said he only had one piece of advice after all that time together, “Never call each other names. You can never take them back.” Continue reading
My adult daughters recently shared a site that asks the simple question, “Do You Know Your Body Shape?”
It then asks you to choose a silhouette from a long line, and indicate which you think most resembles your body. Then it asks you to grab a tape measure and measure yourself and put those measurements in the form provided.
It then tells you how close you were to your actual measurement silhouette.
I was 10% smaller than my guess. That is a little disturbing, I guess, but I am also middle-aged and may have gravitated toward the more matronly silhouettes from that bias.
My girls in their 20’s were a more concerning matter. Both of them estimated that they were 25% larger than they actually are. Think about that for a second. That is a huge over-estimate!
Here, try it yourself. http://www.marisota.co.uk/shop/page?pageId=7758
This matrix comes from a plus-sized clothing store in the U.K., and so I would take my “guesstimate” with a grain of salt. But that said, many women and girls range from simply assuming they are fatter than they are, (regardless of their athletic prowess, mind you!) to the extreme of body dysmorphic disorder.
What can we, as parents and friends, do to change this? I admit, I have always advocated physical activity and eating sensibly to my kids, but it is quite obvious that isn’t enough. They are both athletic, fit, eat sensibly most of the time and are very attractive.
But they evidently don’t see that accurately when they look in the mirror. Continue reading
I recently read an article about a Harvard review of hundreds of studies that concluded that a positive attitude even helps prevent heart attacks. You can read the article here.
Parenting has a lot to do with attitudes, as well. Your attitude, theirs, the extended family’s…it all plays into your child’s developing world view. Sharon Silver notes that there is a cure for “bad attitudes,” and gives some practical tips in “A Cure for the Common Bad Attitude.”
What does it all boil down to? Listen more than you talk and focus on the good things in your life, your children, your job…you get the drift. How do we do that?
How do we decide to be happy?