Holding Space – A Gift You Can Give Your Family

2012-3-24 VandyLawVisit 18My husband and I just visited our older daughter’s law school for a “Parents and Friends Day.”

It was a revelation in many ways. Our daughter had shared the school with us in a small tour when we visited earlier in the year, but this was the official version. She and a friend are regularly leading tours for prospective students in their spare time, and so they were assigned to our group. We got to see them do their actual spiel. It was wonderful, and they were so good at pointing out everything from architectural features to history, while sharing their positive experiences as first year law students at Vanderbilt.

We know, of course, that it is actually the hardest thing our daughter has ever done. We know the challenges, difficulties, disappointments and her feelings because she shares many of them with us. We listen, commiserate, encourage and try very hard not to direct her or solve her problems. They are truly hers to deal with as she sees fit along the way.

I recently participated in a spiritual leadership pilgrimage retreat and along with meditation and observation techniques, we learned about “holding space” for another person.

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